To Fit In or To Belong?

I thought fitting in was my goal but then I realized that I should stop fitting in a world that isn’t my home and start to be at where I belong. Fitting in is trying to be with the majority in expense of sacrificing your own self and identity. You listen more to them, fuel yourself with their beliefs, and let them define and dictate you. You obey whatever they say, you let them choose your career, what types of clothes you wear, what kind of lifestyle you should have, what kind of car you should drive, who you should marry although those weren’t what you really want. But in order to fit in, you obey them.

Be reminded that, Allah created you uniquely with special talents, skills, abilities that only you can contribute to this world. If you keep on trying to please other people and let your decisions be influenced by their demands, then you are depriving yourself from knowing more of your abilities. Before you do a thing, you should not think whether it will please other people but you should ask yourself will it please Allah (swt)?

We live in a world where we are surrounded by people who try to change people for their own benefit. The media show us with better versions of everything and contaminating our mindset with what we should be striving for, that’s why we end up feeling we’re not enough. They try to change us to support their ideas, to get our support and to be their puppets. It’s all for their own benefit. They brainwash people with the new definition of success, life and purpose making the crowd fall into their trap.

Everyone then tries to fit in because they desperately want to feel at home wherever they are. But fitting in will never get you home. Fitting in is about trying to adapt to a world that’s not your own. You don’t belong there. Belonging is about inhabiting the world as the real you. And the hard reality is that you’ll never fit in where you don’t belong. Knowing where you belong will lead you to the right people. As Muslims, we should not fit ourselves in to people who don’t believe and who don’t obey our Creator. We should find our right people and belong there.

The majority looks like it’s safe and secure place and that it’s the right path. But, it isn’t the case in Islam. If you choose Jannah as your destination, you should believe Allah when He says:

“But none had believed with him, except a few.” (11:40)

Our journey in this dunya will always feel like it’s a maze and our beliefs will always be tested. There will always be a time when we will be alone and judged for what we believe in. But, if we constantly place Allah (swt) as the center of our life, we will never feel lonely for when we think of Him in everything we do, we will experience the best form of company that no one could ever give us.

We should accept our identity and embrace our flaws. We should practice and understand the Deen that Allah (swt) blessed us with even it makes us different from the majority. When we have Allah (swt), we will always feel home. And, as we keep on obeying our Creator, we will start meeting the right people who will keep motivating us in worshiping Allah (swt).

Always remember that fitting into the crowd of disbelievers will make you drowned and lost. Belonging to the few who believes in Allah (swt), will always make you guided, protected and loved.

Najmah is a 23 year old Filipino Muslim, Clinical Nutritionist, Med student and Writer. Born and raised in Saudi Arabia. Living in the Philippines since 2010. She is the founder of The Muslim Bricks. You can also find her blogging on her personal blog.By Najmah is her personal blog that contains posts about her life lessons, Islamic reflections, personal excellence and journey to becoming a doctor.

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